A breakup: exercises in style.

 

Breakup

It takes place in a bar. A woman breaks up with a man. He wants to know why. The woman refuses to tell him the truth, not to hurt him. She hands him a book he had lent her. She then gives him a kiss and leaves.

Synonyms:

In a tavern, a drinkery, a pub, a lady, a female, a chick rejects, parts, splits with a gentleman, a male, a guy. He wonders, questions, inquires as to why. She remains elusive, ambiguous, vague. She hands him a book, a novel, a best-seller. Then she gives him a kiss, a smack, a peck and exits, flees, takes off.

Metaphorical:

In a place where ethyl souls wither, a wild cat wants to start from scratch. The abandoned juggles with question marks. She hands him the words and decides it’s time to book this joint. Farewell has never been this cold. The cruel kitty becomes Griffon and flies away, free at last.

Haiku:

Bright summer and dark bar

A silence a book a kiss

Crack! A broken heart

BDSM:

In a dark dungeon, a mistress breaks the bonds that held her slave. He begs her to stop the torture. But the sadist gags her own mouth. She whips out some vanilla hardcover and bites him one last time before she decides to beat it.

Bombastic:

The events take place in a grogshop. An inamorata fractures a relationship. Dismayed, the spurned one demands justification for his demotion. The damsel is evasive and abstruse. She gives him a published document he once owned. Then, she arises from her posterior, gives him a brief canoodle and decamps.

Vulgar:

In a foul and stinking bar, a whore breaks the heart of a spineless pussy who doesn’t have enough brains to understand why the fuck she’s dumping his sorry ass. She keeps mute as a carp with Down syndrome and hands him back his lame book. The slot gives Mister No Balls a disgusting herpes ridden snog and pisses off.

Paranoid:

In a nebulous place, a suspicious woman seems to conspire to out a strange man. He is curious. He smells a rat. Especially since the evasive lady remains ambiguous. Oh, she’s up to no good. She slips him a mysterious book, gives him the kiss of Judas and evaporates in thin air. Real dodgy…

Homeoteleuton:

In an ale house, a spouse loses a louse. He rouses and tries to douse his doubts. She plays mouse with his highbrows. The fouce gives the clouse a book and a chause on the mouth. Then, she bows and goes for a sprouse.

Interjections:

Hi! Hello! So long! Uh! No! Whoa! Wait! Here! Smack! Bye!

Frenchisms:

In a chic bistro, a belle bids adieu to her fiancé. As he loses his joie de vivre, she plays some jeu d’esprit and goes «C’est la vie! ». The coquette gives the ingénu his grimoire back and, as a coup de grâce, a blasé bisou on the cheek.  Zut alors! Cherchez la femme fatale!

Speculative:

It happened in a bar or some kind of restaurant. Maybe she gave him an appointment to be in a neutral location. Or maybe he wanted to be in the place where they first met. In short, the girl breaks up with the guy. Surely they didn’t click or he was a crappy lover. The guy doesn’t understand why. Or doesn’t grasp her innuendos. Or maybe the girl is just a player. She hands him a book that looks long and boring. No doubt that another guy is waiting outside because she gives him a quick kiss and runs away.

But perhaps she turned the corner of the alley and stated crying. Who knows?

Reversed:

It takes place at his apartment. The woman says she is in love with him. The man does not want to hear that. He explains why he feels nothing for her more than friendship. The woman wants to get back her love letters. He has thrown them away. In tears, she holds on to him.

And she refuses to leave…

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